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Fozia Ghafoor
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Distortions are not entirely inborn, rather they are shaped over time through environmental influences and learned behavior. From early childhood, the human mind observes, absorbs, and imitates. Parents, family, society, and even literature contribute to the formation of our thinking patterns.
Yes, you read it right, Literature.
Stories do not merely entertain, they shape perception. A child does not always distinguish between what is contextual and what is universal. As a result, behaviors presented in stories may be adopted without understanding the conditions in which they were originally practiced. Our minds, especially in early years, are highly imitative. Some absorb what is balanced and appropriate, while others internalize patterns that may not align with their own reality. The issue is not the presence of values, but the absence of contextual reasoning.
A personal example illustrates this clearly. The story of the mother of Abdul Qadir Jilani, who maintained strict boundaries regarding non-mahram men, left a deep impression on my mind. Without understanding her environment marked by isolation and a very different social structure. I internalized the behavior in a literal sense. Growing up in a family and education system where interaction is sometimes necessary, this unexamined imitation led to several specific cognitive and behavioral distortions:
Overgeneralization: A specific "rule" intended for an isolated environment was applied to all social situations. The boundary shifted from "interact with caution" to "do not interact at all," regardless of necessity.
Black-and-White Thinking: Behavior was categorized into two extremes—Total Silence (Virtuous) versus Any Interaction (Non-Virtuous)—leaving no room for a "Middle Path" where communication is both modest and functional.
Contextual Blindness: The mind failed to distinguish between universal values (modesty) and contextual applications (isolation vs. modern society). It treated the physical action as the virtue, rather than the intent behind it.
Learned Avoidance: By avoiding necessary communication, the mind missed the "social repetitions" required to build confidence, turning a moral pursuit into a functional deficit.
The distortion, therefore, did not originate from the value itself, but from its application without context. This highlights a critical gap in how knowledge is transmitted. It is not enough to provide values alone; they must be accompanied by the right reasoning, at the right age, within the right context. Every piece of knowledge leaves an imprint, but its direction depends on how it is understood.
When values are taught with context, they become tools for clarity. When absorbed without reasoning, they risk turning into distortions. Right reasoning does not reject values. It aligns them with reality.
